Many of you have asked me for ideas on messages to send to keep the ball rolling after a great first date… Here you go.
The time between two dates is often filled with internal tension and doubts :
How do you handle those few days before seeing him again…
and especially, how do you manage communication during that time?
How to handle things through messages to send after the first date
In this article, I’ll share 8 examples of messages you can draw inspiration from and make your own to improve communication after a first date.
Because let’s be honest, you don’t want to fall into some kind of power struggle or force yourself to act in a way that doesn’t feel authentic. You have this natural spontaneity and emotion that’s just waiting to come through. But suddenly, you freeze up, telling yourself: ‘No, the rule is that the man should text first after the date.’ In doing so, you’re engaging in a subtle power game, a tug-of-war with yourself, just to elicit a response from him.
Here, we’re stepping away from rigid rules about who’s supposed to text first. Instead, we’re aiming for a flow—a natural, effortless communication. Think of it like water: we want to move fluidly and let things unfold naturally.
Basic principles and message examples
Before diving into the examples, I think it’s important to remind you what you can aim for in your communication after this date :
✅ Let him know you had a great time (either subtly through your tone or more directly).
✅ Keep the conversation flowing naturally so it doesn’t feel like there’s an awkward pause or restart.
✅ Avoid coming across as too eager; instead, maintain a bit of mystery and attraction.
Here’s the list of 8 message examples. You’ll notice they’re personalized—you can’t just copy-paste them from one person to another because they’re closely tied to the moment you shared and what you talked about.
I hope this gives you some inspiration. And I invite you to check out my video for a full and detailed analysis of these message examples.
– “Thanks for yesterday. I keep laughing to myself thinking about your impression.”
– “Thanks again for such a great evening. See you soon 😚 PS: I was right about XYZ.”
– “I feel like I’m going to have trouble falling asleep tonight 😉 and I don’t think I’ll be the only one.”
– “You really surprised me yesterday. Next week, let me show you one of my favorite spots 😌.”
– “Say hi to your sore muscles 😉 Next time, if you’re good, I’ll show you how to stretch your hamstrings.”
– “Read ‘Invitation to the Voyage’ from Les Fleurs du Mal. Trust me, you’ll love it.”
– “1. I think you cheated, and 2. I want a rematch. Have a great day 😚.”
– “I’m smiling to myself thinking about yesterday. Have a great day!
The perfect framework for a date
The idea behind all the advice in this is to manage communication smoothly after your first date. If you’re asking yourself these kinds of questions, then you’re probably wondering the following as well :
“Should I send him a message after the first date ?”
“When should I invite him over? What if I sleep with him too soon and he starts taking me for granted ?”
“Is it me, or is it him who should pay ?”
“Should I suggest another date? And if so, when ?”
Imagine if, instead of asking yourself a thousand questions about what to do, when to do it, whether it’s ‘right’ or not, whether it ‘fits’ with who you are, and spending days with a head full of doubts, I help you get rid of all that unnecessary mental load so you can focus only on what really matters !
